LETTER TO OUR FUTURE AU PAIR

Dear Future Au Pair,

Welcome to our family! We are so happy to have found you and are so excited to welcome you into our home.

Before you arrive, we would like to talk to you about what we expect from you and what you can expect from us. First, we would like to welcome you into our home with respect and love, and we hope you will respond in the same way. We know you might be travelling a long way from home, and this may be the first time you are away from your family for so long too! So we will give you some space to settle in, just know that the children are excited to meet you and may not be able to respect your space for the first few days as they will be getting used to having a new family member in the home.

We can understand that when you arrive, we might not be everything you expect, and that maybe you built up expectations of what your au pair experience will be like, but we have to ask you to keep an open mind. No household is the same. When you first arrive into someone else’s home with different rules and different standards as your own, it can be a bit overwhelming! However, while we can be a little flexible to accommodate you and your needs, we will be doing our best to keep routines and cleanliness the same to provide stability for the children. It would be amazing if you can acknowledge that and do your best to slot right in to our family.

As well as being a member of the family and helping to take care of the children, it is important to know that you are also our flatmate. This means that housework will be shared between all of us as we all live in the same place and want it to be a nice environment to live in! This housework will be normal chores such as helping vacuum, cleaning the kitchen, bathrooms, laundry and helping to keep the house tidy. We don’t know what you are used to doing at home and if this will be too much to ask, but we would appreciate you communicating with us and asking any questions you may have about this! Open communication is key!

Speaking of communication, it is really important to us for you to tell us how you feel or think about certain situations, if you are feeling uncomfortable or sad. During this experience we will be learning each others likes and dislikes and neither of us can expect to know each other’s right away. We will learn these the best if we communicate them clearly and in a mature way. You can feel free to call a meeting with either or both parents, or write a letter to us, or if it’s just a minor thing, you can say it or text it to us. The most important thing is that we are all happy and comfortable with each other in order to be the best team for the children.

Our children are the most important things in the world to us. There is nothing and no one that can convince us otherwise. I know you may not have had children yet so you can only imagine what this feeling is like! To leave our precious things in the care of someone new can sometimes be hard for us. Therefore, it is really important for our children and us build trust with you. So in the first days or weeks we think we should spend time together as a family first so don’t be surprised if we are around more than you thought, and don’t worry, you will have time to build up a special relationship with the children by yourself too. Something that will help will be to do a few Skype calls with each other before you arrive. We expect for you to be a good friend to our children, to enjoy their company while at the same time setting boundaries for the children to keep them safe and help them to build respect for you. Being a friend does not mean you let them walk all over you! If you have any questions on how to manage any sort of behaviour or what activities our children enjoy the most, just ask us!

Finally, future au pair, we know it can be exhausting to look for a host family. You may have been looking for a long time and could be anxious to start your experience. Our family may sound like a great opportunity (and I am sure it is because I think my family is the best in the world!) but before you arrive make sure you have taken a moment to ask yourself.

1. Is this family in a location I want to be in?

2. Am I able to manage this amount of children?

3. Is the pocket money enough for what I want to achieve?

4. Am I having any doubts? Why? Can they be resolved by talking about them?

5. Am I ok to leave my country for this long?

6. Will I have the opportunity to continue to do the things I enjoy doing?

When you have reflected on this opportunity and you are still sure about being our au pair and staying with us then what are you waiting for!!

See you soon!

Your future host family.