LETTER TO MY FUTURE HOST FAMILY

This letter is written from the perspective of an au pair preparing to accept a position with a new family. It is designed to be a broad letter that covers most aspects of what a family should consider before hiring an au pair. If you would like to be have an editable copy of this letter to show your future host family please see the download link at the bottom of this page.

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For any suggestions, comments, or queries, please email us at aupairwithcare@gmail.com. 

Dear future host family,

Thank you so much for accepting me to be your next au pair. I am so excited to start this cultural exchange with you! Before I arrive, there are some things we need to talk about and make clear first.

One of the most important things I need you to understand is that in order to do this cultural exchange, I am leaving the comfort and familiarity of my country and in my home to live in a foreign place with a different language, different society, and a different family culture. It is going to be a huge change for me and I am so excited for it but also a little nervous. There are many things I will be learning and your support with help me learn faster and to be more confident with your family.

My normal support network will be far away and I might need to lean on you a little bit. If you can help me to build a new network that would be awesome! Asking around to see if there are other au pairs in your area and if not-whether there are any young people interested in hanging out with me! I’m sure hanging out with your children will be fun, but I need some time to hang out with people my own age.

My time is important to me. Sometimes I will want to socialise, study, work, or have some down time by myself. In order for me to make these plans it is important that you keep to your word. I know that sometimes it is stressful to balance your work and home lives but for me a schedule and a secure amount of pocket money is important! This means I can make plans, have time to study the local language, plan a weekend trip, or even pick up an extra part time job! So, please keep your word and I will do my best to keep mine!

Keeping your word with money is also very important. For the au pair experience I have brought some savings but am also relying on you to pay me enough and on time. I know there are guidelines in your country on the minimum and average au pair pocket money but I would appreciate it if you thought about your specific situation. Are you located near or far from the places or cities I will want to visit? Is public transport expensive? Are activities and foods expensive? How is the exchange rate between our currencies? Alongside this, if I need to pay for activities, food or transport for the children, my preference would be that you gave me the money first and I give you the change. If I do need to pay for it from my pocket, then I need you to pay it back alongside my weeks pocket money at the latest. Sometimes, it is hard to talk about money with someone you’ve just met, so let’s be clear about how this will all work before I arrive, so neither of us is in doubt.

Please know that I will appreciate what you will do for me, and the fact that you will be providing me with three meals a day. However if you ask me what types of foods I would like and enjoy and make an effort to have those in your household that would be amazing! It would make me so happy. You know the saying ‘the way to a person’s heart is through their stomach’? It’s true!

I will do my best to be an amazing au pair for your family. I will listen, respect you, respect the children, and do my best to understand and follow the family rules. In return I would really appreciate the same back as well as acknowledgement of my actions. It is really encouraging for me to be in a positive and supportive home/work environment to make my experience great!

Before I fly to you, have you taken a moment to ask yourselves these questions?

1. Why do we need an au pair?

2. Do we need more cleaning or more childcare? Have we made this clear?

3. Can we fit another individual with their own needs and personality into our lives?

4. Will we treat our au pair like a member of the family?

5. Have we prepared our children well for this big change?

When you have taken a moment to reflect on these questions and you are still sure you want and need an au pair, then let’s book everything! I look forward to meeting you all!

See you soon,

Your future au pair.